thinking about the structure of my book got me pondering resources v. experiences. know i want to honor the voices & reference materials that were navigators & mechanics on this life journey.
ah, the voices. am blessed with a keen memory, which - as mentioned in previous posts - has helped keep me on even keel. remembering voices that resounded throughout my life, leaving lessons behind.
the first words ever spoken about me set me apart as different from anyone else in the family - doc andy's amazed comment about my red hair. sort of set the stage, in a way.
next up would be peter's oft-repeated (by mom) admonition, "mother, you'll have to take care of this one." ian was his.
peter also voiced the next comment i'm aware of (also oft-repeated by mom), regretting my lack of redeeming qualities, "why must she always speak such drivel?" (the 14-year gap helps explain the disconnect, but i seriously did speak amazing drivel through all my years, at least in prl's experience).
this last comment gives me special pause. i was so very different from his experience of mim as a sister. he could always find something of interest to talk with her about since she was deeply interested in and involved with sports, whereas my #1 interest from 1958 onward was television.
finding that interesting - 1958. didn't realize until this very moment that my hardcore interest, my fantasy world based around it, started in '58. thought it was earlier, when ian was still alive. but just googled "jeff spencer" and "77 sunset strip" and there it was - roger smith played the part from 1958-1963. and robert vaughn as napoleon solo stepped in the very next year.
1958. that year resounds throughout my being. and illustrates my whimsically practical way of dealing with things touching my life ~ in the midst of an increasing (albeit rarely verbalized & never open) hostile home environment, i seized the only life preserver that seemed to present itself & i clung to it for dear life.
until the right life guard - john - came along to help me unpry my arms from around it & lead me to sound footing on safe ground.
this book writing could turn out to be way more interesting than i expected.
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